After Math

It is cruel how my own heartbreak betrayed me for so many days. I want you. I hate you. I love you. F* you. Why me? Come back. Go away. I wasn’t ready to stop loving him. After 461 days of bliss, what went wrong? Why did he leave me that way? (February 14, 2016)

I discovered that sometimes one needs to do a lot of screaming at no one in particular before one is ready to settle into the ruin and feel the decay. After avoiding it for seven months, there finally came that day. (September 15, 2016)

At last, 276 days later, my heart feels but it’s not wrecked. I watched as he slammed back two drinks before the concert, reluctantly engaged in small talk while avoiding eye contact, and quickly made his escape. It is so obvious he is hurt but cannot afford to feel. I am so much richer. I have no need to settle. Thank you for letting me get away. (November 16, 2016)

~Just L (November 17, 2016)

Author’s Note: On 11/16/2016, I saw him at our 11/11/2014 first date location… The very same restaurant before the very same concert on both days… Only this time I had a better view. *wink*

Is it a coincidence that it took me the length of a normal pregnancy to arrive at this day?

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