Why Do Some People Attract So Many Mosquitoes?

It’s not a competition
But if it is, I’ve won
I am living the dream
And it’s only just begun

I’ve been used and betrayed
And poked in the eye
I confidently fix my crown
My head and my heels high

I smell like cotton candy
My skin is just as sweet
Small minds want a taste
Their otherwise incomplete

Mocked, misunderstood
For my great happiness
Pests cannot lift up others
Cannot comprehend this

My fairy tale was burst long ago
It seems overrated and overdone
I’ve had lovers in 14 countries
Though I’d settle for a lifetime with the right one

I’m attracted to sparkly humans
The kind and the generous in spirit
Pure intentions with a moral compass
And someone who’s a bit satiric

Give me one who is well-rounded
Equal parts naughty and nice
Some PDA? Yes please…
Don’t have to ask me twice!

Beaches, fireworks, roller coasters
Concerts, travel, wine and food
Or snuggles by a crackling fire
Gets me in the mood

Oh, I’ve been loved and hated
By men, but mostly women
Jealousy is a terrible disease
Glad I haven’t been bitten

I adore my female friends
We lift each other up
And slather on insect repellent
Sharing life lessons and makeup

My heart remains soft
Much like my well-chosen words
Honestly, I curse a little (or a lot)
But hate and bigotry is never deserved

I’ll age like fine wine
As I have no bitter roots
Beauty and old are not mutually exclusive
Occasionally I rock thigh-high boots

I have done my time in an office
Traded the boardroom to become a Goddess
Overcame challenges, too many me, toos
What, you expect me to be modest?!

I don’t care what others think
My character and integrity are gold
I’ve worked in war-torn countries
Like a lioness I am bold

My adult children are my heart
They are better versions of me
My parents are shining examples
How good a life lived well can be

It’s not a competition
But if it is, I’ve won
I live my life out loud
Because at 55, it’s just begun!

~Just L (December 4, 2018)

Author’s Note: A little love and silliness — the best antidote for pests!

An Amusing Modern Fairytale by a Matriarch

Once upon a time a First Nation princess and a Mexican empress tried to convince me that my Jamaican Lion was in love with each of them more than he was in love with me. Realizing he was only in love with himself, I lived happily ever after jetsetting to my homes around the world, collecting art, being paid to write, loving and being loved by my tribe, and enjoying my abundant life on my own terms because a Queen doesn’t need a King. The end.

~ Just L (November 21, 2018)

Author’s Note: It’s all women’s work (for scraps) in a lion’s pride.

I’d much rather be me than you, dear

How does it feel that your supposed seriously committed boyfriend was cheating on you with me until I discovered as much and broke it off with him immediately?

When you continue, long after the fact, to convince me that he loves you, flaunting headless body shots and posting mean girl memes to make your point, isn’t that queer?

He is no prize. I discarded him for good reason. Congratulations on your win.

I’d much rather be me than you, dear.

~ Lori J Bumgardner instead of Just L, because there is nothing poetic about this (November 18, 2018)

Author’s Note:

Confident women set healthy boundaries. They aren’t afraid to walk away when something isn’t working and the thought that they won’t be able to find better or that they will wind up alone doesn’t cross their mind. They can quickly see when a situation is damaging and will remove themselves immediately. Only insecure people put up with treatment that is unacceptable, in large part because they feel that that’s what they deserve on some level. When you learn to value yourself, you will weed out anyone who doesn’t truly value you.

Drafts from my upcoming chapbook on narcissists and cheaters. Working title: “Love Bombed”

We Take Selfies and Laugh

“….For the final time, leave us alone” I read out loud as I lie in your lap.

Stroking my hair you ask, “Who’s us?”

“I suppose she and her 375-word [most recent] tirade.”

“No, babe you are just “self-centered and delusional” enough to believe that her Facebook posts clearly directed at you and her direct messages (DM) to you have nothing to do with you.”

“And I “parade images around of [you] on social media like [you] are just a piece of meat.”

We take selfies and laugh.

~ Just L (October 3, 2018)

What if… *mind blown*

What if the reason for meeting him (#1) was that the Universe made sure he (#1) abruptly broke it off with me knowing I would seek a beach in Mexico for solace and meet him (#2) who would ensure I would return and entice me to stay just long enough to meet him (#3) who had not yet arrived?

*mind blown*

~Just L (September 27, 2018)

Back It Up

Just know that I want you back
Hurry before I slip through the cracks
I don’t know where I’m going
I can’t stand this plateauing
I don’t want to hear you
I just want to feel you
I don’t care what you say
Except you’re coming my way
Send chills down my spine
Skin on skin smoothly divine
Rumbling through my soul
Present with no goal
I so deserve this
Weightless bliss
All my boxes checked
Until we feel perfect

Did I say I want you back?
I meant I want you on your back.

~Just L (March 21, 2018)

Author’s Note: It’s hump day.