If You Want to Change the World, Love a Woman

As we enter 2019, and become resolute about new things, it is a good time to revisit this gorgeous piece:

When a fairly spiritual male friend of mine who had finally found and was deepening into committed relationship with his soul mate confided in me he was thinking of being single again, and in the next breath expressed his latest idea for raising consciousness worldwide, I wrote this poem.

If you want to change the world… love a woman-really love her.
Find the one who calls to your soul, who doesn’t make sense.
Throw away your check list and put your ear to her heart and listen.
Hear the names, the prayers, the songs of every living thing-
every winged one, every furry and scaled one,
every underground and underwater one, every green and flowering one,
every not yet born and dying one…
Hear their melancholy praises back to the One who gave them life.
If you haven’t heard your own name yet, you haven’t listened long enough.
If your eyes aren’t filled with tears, if you aren’t bowing at her feet,
you haven’t ever grieved having almost lost her.

If you want to change the world… love a woman-one woman
beyond yourself, beyond desire and reason,
beyond your male preferences for youth, beauty and variety
and all your superficial concepts of freedom.
We have given ourselves so many choices
we have forgotten that true liberation
comes from standing in the middle of the soul’s fire
and burning through our resistance to Love.
There is only one Goddess.
Look into Her eyes and see-really see
if she is the one to bring the axe to your head.
If not, walk away. Right now.
Don’t waste time “trying.”
Know that your decision has nothing to do with her
because ultimately it’s not with who,
but when we choose to surrender.

If you want to change the world… love a woman.
Love her for life-beyond your fear of death,
beyond your fear of being manipulated
by the Mother inside your head.
Don’t tell her you’re willing to die for her.
Say you’re willing to LIVE with her,
plant trees with her and watch them grow.
Be her hero by telling her how beautiful she is in her vulnerable majesty,
by helping her to remember every day that she IS Goddess
through your adoration and devotion.

If you want to change the world… love a woman
in all her faces, through all her seasons
and she will heal you of your schizophrenia-
your double-mindedness and half-heartedness
which keeps your Spirit and body separate-
which keeps you alone and always looking outside your Self
for something to make your life worth living.
There will always be another woman.
Soon the new shiny one will become the old dull one
and you’ll grow restless again, trading in women like cars,
trading in the Goddess for the latest object of your desire.
Man doesn’t need any more choices.
What man needs is Woman, the Way of the Feminine,
of Patience and Compassion, non-seeking, non-doing,
of breathing in one place and sinking deep intertwining roots
strong enough to hold the Earth together
while she shakes off the cement and steel from her skin.

If you want to change the world… love a woman, just one woman .
Love and protect her as if she is the last holy vessel.
Love her through her fear of abandonment
which she has been holding for all of humanity.
No, the wound is not hers to heal alone.
No, she is not weak in her codependence.

If you want to change the world… love a woman
all the way through
until she believes you,
until her instincts, her visions, her voice, her art, her passion,
her wildness have returned to her-
until she is a force of love more powerful
than all the political media demons who seek to devalue and destroy her.

If you want to change the world,
lay down your causes, your guns and protest signs.
Lay down your inner war, your righteous anger
and love a woman…
beyond all of your striving for greatness,
beyond your tenacious quest for enlightenment.
The holy grail stands before you
if you would only take her in your arms
and let go of searching for something beyond this intimacy.

What if peace is a dream which can only be remembered
through the heart of Woman?
What if a man’s love for Woman, the Way of the Feminine
is the key to opening Her heart?

If you want to change the world…love a woman
to the depths of your shadow,
to the highest reaches of your Being,
back to the Garden where you first met her,
to the gateway of the rainbow realm
where you walk through together as Light as One,
to the point of no return,
to the ends and the beginning of a new Earth.

By Lisa Citore (2008)

See Lisa’s other poetry here.

Be With A Man That Knows How To Love Hard

A man who loves so hard will liberate you on every level. A man whose love emancipates you from your confines, and makes you believe that anything in life is possible.

A man who knows how to love hard will look at you like you are made of magic. The kind of shimmering magic that you feel when you are staring at the sun cast its golden rays down upon the clouds of billowing smoke, turning them bright red; fire red.

A man who will care for you, listen to you, and adore you. He won’t drain your energy or make you feel like giving is only one sided.

A man that respects you on every level- your personality, your values, your religious beliefs, your emotional needs, your physical needs, your general outlook regarding life, your flaws and your past.

A man who prefers date night to consist of you, a man that does more than penetrate you, a man that knows every inch of your body, he knows how to finger your desires and gives you the kind of soul fucking that happens when your limbs are intertwined, and the depth of your conversation becomes the entertainment for the night.

A man who wants to know your fears, worries, insecurities, phobias, and doubts, and wants even more to love you through every last one of them.

A man that knows every layer of your being, your positives, your negatives, your early morning messy look to the flawless red-carpet look of yours. It’s not just how hot or cute you look, it’s the overall essence of your being which he adores. He’s not just into you sexually, he loves you for who you are.

A man who will be there, through all of the inevitable speed bumps of life. A real man will never run away from a situation. He’s a man who’ll put in efforts and fix things no matter how uncomfortable it makes him feel.

A man that on your worst days is there to remind you, that yes you are allowed to feel that way. And when the tough times inevitably roll through your shared lives, make sure you date a man who can look deeply into your eyes and say, “We’ve got this.

A man who lovingly listens to how your day went and knows exactly when to steer you away from your own stormy seas when life’s pressures pile up in too big of a mountain for you to climb on your own.

A man who leaves love notes for you to find scattered throughout your life and not because it’s Valentine’s Day or your Anniversary, but just because. A man that notices the little things you do and won’t miss a chance to express his appreciation towards you to elevate you and to make you feel important. Because he knows at a bone-deep level how much of a prize you are.

A man who wants nothing more than to assist in the ever-expanding greatness of your life. This man will push you forward to live a life of your dreams than be a road blocker. He’s not the man who’ll envy you of your achievements and the large vision you hold for yourself. He’ll celebrate with you and support you. He is not threatened by your successes; he relishes them.

A man that wants to integrate you into his life and bring you around his family and friends. He wants them to love you, and for you to love them. He wants you to be an extension of him and include you in important events and milestones.

This man will open up your world for you, and you will gladly do the same for him.

You see, a REAL man leads with his love.
You will feel it when he enters the room.
You will not have to question.
You will not have to wonder.
He will wrap you in his arms and won’t let go.

A real man loves hard.

You deserve to be loved fiercely.

Be with a man who loves like this, and you will begin to access a depth of love and self-love that you previously had not had access to.

– Mitzi J Hernandez (Published February 22 2018)

He Doesn’t Need You To Fix Him

He doesn’t need you to fix him
But to live your life unapologetically
Support him
But grow on your own
Unconditionally love yourself first then him
He doesn’t need a mother
A savior or even a queen
Instead be his lover
His best friend
And partner in crime
Because he doesn’t need to be rescued from himself
It’s not in how much we give
How much we try to do
It’s about healing but also strength
We can’t say be a man
And then treat him like a child whose problems we step in to solve
We can’t say be a man
Yet then doubt his ability to do just that
Because he doesn’t need a manager for his life
He doesn’t need someone to tell him how to do it
But simply to take the time to do it for himself
To take the opportunity to do his own work for his own reasons, his own purpose
To find his own way apart from the desires or expectations of those around him
And to know we have confidence in him while he does just that
Regardless of where it may lead
Yet to step in and try to fix or solve
Is to take away his divine masculinity
His personal essence
And while we should always be his peace
His equal
To do that means we need to see the strength that already exists
The competence in their eyes
And the need to be the warriors of their own lives
Because the burdens in life are placed differently upon the shoulders of men
Yet often questions and doubts reign
As if we need to design the blueprint for their lives so they don’t fuck it up
As if somehow we know more
Better than they do
Yet what it seems to escape some
Is that while he’s a work in progress
He’s not your project to finish
The truth is he’s amazing just as he is
Just as you are
It’s never letting the love grow bigger than both of your independence
So it’s about being there to help
But not control
Being there to support
But not be superior
Being there to inspire
But not take over
Being there to love
But not judge
Because it’s never been about which woman makes him be his best self
But rather the woman that inspires him to become his best self for
So love on him
Let him be the man that he already is
And have the confidence in him to become the man he is destined to be.

Kate Rose

Author’s Note: Kate Rose is an artist, free thinker, lover, writer, passionate yogi, teacher, mother, rule breaker, and rebel. I think Kate Rose is my spirit animal! I love her poetry and mindful ramblings.

Kate recently wrote to me: “Beautiful site and collection of words… stay wild in love.” I feel so honored she took the time to send me an email.

In 2016, I was inspired by her, “We Only “in Love with 3 People in Our Lifetime — Each One for a Specific Reason,” but didn’t know it was hers. Still, I am open to #3….

Though her “3 Loves” has been stolen by many as being their own, she has a book coming out in 2019 on just this topic!

The Seven Natural Laws of Love

We cannot demand, command love anymore than we can command the moon and the stars, or the wind and rain. We can stage a seduction or mount a courtship, but the result is more likely to be infatuation, or two illusions dancing together, than love.

Love is bigger than you are. You can invite love, but you cannot dictate how, when, and where love expresses itself. You can choose to surrender to love or not, but in the end, love strikes like lightning: unpredictable and irrefutable. Love does not come with conditions, stipulations, addenda, or codes. Like the sun, love radiates independently of our fears and desires.

Love cannot be bought or sold. One can buy companionship, attention, and loyalty. You cannot make someone love you, nor can you prevent it — not for any amount of money. Love cannot be imprisoned, nor can it be legislated.

Love cannot be turned on as a reward. It cannot be turned off as a punishment. Only something else pretending to be love can be used as a lure, as a hook, for bait and switch, imitated, insinuated, but the real deal can never be delivered if it doesn’t spring freely from the heart.

This doesn’t mean that love allows destructive and abusive behaviors to go unchecked. Love speaks out for justice and protests when harm is being done. Love points out the consequences of hurting oneself or others. Love allows room for anger, grief, or pain to be expressed and released. But love does not threaten to withhold itself if it doesn’t get what it wants.

Love cares what becomes of you, because love knows that we are all interconnected. Love is inherently compassionate and empathic. Love knows that the “other” is also oneself. This is the true nature of love, and love itself can not be manipulated or restrained. Love honors the sovereignty of each soul. Love is its own law.

– Excerpted from The Seven Natural Laws of Love, by Deborah Anapol

Author’s Note: I encourage you to read her work in full.

Because you never ever have to inspire anyone to meet you on the bridge

“Someone can be madly in love with you and still not be ready. They can love you in a way you have never been loved and still not join you on the bridge. And whatever their reasons you must leave. Because you never ever have to inspire anyone to meet you on the bridge. You never ever have to convince someone to do the work to be ready. There is more extraordinary love, more love that you have never seen, out here in this wide and wild universe. And there is the love that will be ready.” – Nayyirah Waheed

Author’s Note: I am a collector of quotes on love. See Quotes for other thoughts on love and loss.