Our Union An Oeuvre

When I need the warmth of an embrace

Cadence of words, sweet reassurance

Your luscious mouth my wounds erase

Blowing rhythmically lifting my stance

Under moonlight sharing a dance

Pressing the small of my back’s curve

Inhaling your vetiver fragrance

Our union an Oeuvre!

~Just L (A Ballade, October 9, 2017)

You fight to defend a lover, not to win one…

Love only works when you both love each other with the same intensity. You fight to defend a lover, not to win one. If you do, it’s not love.

~ Lori Bumgardner AKA Just L (October 31, 2016)
Goddess Wisdom

Read other Quotes by Just L.

Author’s Note: Never, ever, want someone who doesn’t want you.

Someone who can’t see your innate value doesn’t deserve a place in your precious heart.

The toll it takes is devastating and can ravage your sense of self if you let it fester, instilling deep seeded feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt along the way.

When someone starts giving you excuses as to why they can’t do something what they’re really doing is telling you they don’t want to do the thing in question.

Don’t make excuses for them. Don’t waste your time.

Past Tense

At last her declarations of love became “I am”

As in “I am love!”

He, once her everything, a has been

Love in the past tense

As in “I was”

And so it shall be hence

As he can’t bear to let anyone in

Now who’s the crazy one?

~Just L (October 11, 2016)

Your brilliance snags me

Your brilliance snags me but for only a moment. A passing star on a journey which I cannot abide. Here I stand in awe as you fade from my sight only to ponder the journey that lies ahead for those who catch a glimpse of your path…

~Adam (A little note for Just L from the best martini mixologist in Capitola, CA, July 2016)

“Love Letters” are letters to or from Just L periodically pulled from the vault.

Love Letters – Lost in Translation

My Beloved:

There are two essential ingredients proven to correlate with a happy existence: “One is love. The other is finding a way of coping with life that does not push love away.”

I believe I have proven by my actions – over and over – that I love, respect and value you. I know I am a woman who deserves all of that in exchange. And I thought that I have simply by being me – a person of high integrity, sincerity, self-sufficient, and safe – allowed you / me to give / receive love with ease, openness, and vulnerability. I have counted us – our most intimate parts – and everything that covers and sustains us as sacred. I have done my very best to support and nurture you as you navigate in the world; to honor you as a man, and more importantly as “my” man; and to be a best friend who has a positive effect on your self-esteem and well-being. Though our attraction sparkles, and our many days have been filled with fun, my love for you runs deep, far beyond a fleeting romantic feeling.

From the moment you declared you were falling in love with me, I have selflessly and happily offered to you:

  • Expressions of affection, both physical and emotional.
  • A wish to offer you pleasure and satisfaction.
  • Tenderness, compassion, and sensitivity to your needs.
  • A desire for shared activities and pursuits, discovering new adventures.
  • A playful partner who will forever be young in spirit and value fun.
  • Concern, comfort, and outward assistance for your aspirations.
  • An ongoing, honest exchange of personal feelings.
  • A level of maturity that can withstand inevitable shortcomings.
  • Protect your solitude, safeguarding the fragile parts of our humanity.
  • A promise to extend to you an abundant amount of grace when fear, anger and hurt arises, recognizing always what is beautiful and worthy and true between us.
  • A level of sharing of possessions that I expected would naturally grow over time.
  • Believing in a future together, integrating you wholeheartedly into my life and family.

Have I in every instance met my own high standard perfectly? No. I have at times surely failed. Have you in every instance met my needs? No. You remain decidedly guarded. I have never deceived you or misled you in a way that would fracture your sense of reality. I have been patient and gentle with you. There is no doubt – as proven by my actions (beyond the many poetic words I have penned to you or about you) that I love you, I want you, I admire you, and I respect you. I adore you – entirely as is. I have never wavered on this.

I am a woman of faith, but I am not a fool. I have made a conscious choice to share my all with you – I am ALL IN. I have withheld nothing from you. I hope that I am not mistaken in my understanding, after all this time and shared moments, of the depth of your love for me and your commitment to me. I pray I have not misjudged you, one I believed to be a quality and courageous man of high character.

At this moment, I am bereft.  While I am not broken, my heart surely is.

You hold the key as to whether we continue to create something uniquely beautiful together or tragically break apart. Also recognize indecision becomes a decision with time.

I hope you return to love.

~Just L (written what seems like once upon a time, shared on my site June 21, 2016)

First Kiss

“Love Letters” are letters to or from Just L periodically pulled from the vault.

 

Three Falling

Fall Everyday

A Short Story

L: How far is it between falling in love and fallen?

A: A short step.

~ Just L (found poem, Christmas Day Conversation, 2014)

 

 

The Equation of Falling

How fast something falls is known as the acceleration of gravity.
(This is just the way gravity works – it accelerates everything at exactly the same rate.)
How quickly someone falls has no such logic at all.

scars fall ~ Just L (found poem, December 24, 2014)

 

Reti-scent Acceleration

Your scent is an instant flume ride to bliss…
That sensation of feeling weightless when at the top of a rollercoaster;
I am fully aware I am about to fall;
Everything inside is being pushed around;
But I don’t have a sinking feeling.

~ Just L (found poem, December 9, 2014)

100 Days – A Long Time to Long

Perhaps too long….

In 2400 hours or 144,000 minutes

I’ve had approximately 500 dreams
And cried a thousand tears
My heart has beat 10,368,000 times
Still, I am yours yet you are not mine

I’ve blinked 15,360 blinks
Grown three inches of hair
Light has traveled 1,609,479,909,600 miles from the Sun
And I am entirely heart broken

In 100 days F.D.R. established a legacy
100 days of rejection therapy can make you fearless (Jia Jiang’s TED talk)
It is said if you practice anything for 100 days it becomes habit
Shit.

~Just L (May 25, 2016)

It All Goes Away With You

HOW sweet your voice can be
I know
For sure. I’m going to miss
When you go
Not just a kiss
It’s all that flows
Inside my mind:

OH beautiful mother
Of Two
There are those
Among us
Who have touched
Your skin, your lips
And now realize
How precious
Your LIFE is;

(Who is not to cry
In your arms
After seeing light
In your eyes);

OH pretty lady
You stand so fine
Your body and mind
I wish I could
Steal you and fly
To lovers land

Ever since I walked
Next to you
Your dream
Has been
Coming back to me
And it’s so fine
So real
I could follow you
For a hundred years
My emotions
Have just begun
But now I close my eyes
You will be gone
So far
So close you are
Inside my heart:

(You stand alone
And steal the power
Of those who want
To be your lover)

Good Bye
My Love
It all goes
Away with YOU.

~Adrian Rodriguez (Handwritten love letter/poem by Adrian for me, Just L, August 1992)

Published in the October 2015 Blender of Love Digest

“Love Letters” are letters to or from Just L periodically pulled from the vault.

Author’s Note: It started when we met on a walk and ended when I moved from UC San Diego to the University of Oregon. He would have followed me anywhere on earth… Alas, I said “No” and he returned to Mexico City.