The Poetry Between Us

I appreciate you each new day. You are simple, natural, waking up still sleepy. You are my sweet dream in your own way. I had this epiphany. I adore the lilt in your voice. It is finer than a symphony.

Feet

I find sleeping in tangled sheets deeply affects my ability to entwine our bare feet.

And, soothing my weary soul with your touch quickens my heartbeat. With you, I feel safe, whole. When we share a beach fire over aged spirits in a bottle, and you kiss me plainly on the mouth stokes my desire. No doubt, I am committed to you. Your strong values I admire. You are in word and actions true. I love you more and more. When you say I love you, too, my heart is entirely yours. In this, we really have no choice. Together, our depths soar. Let’s simply rejoice.

~Just L (May 21, 2018)

Your brilliance snags me

Your brilliance snags me but for only a moment. A passing star on a journey which I cannot abide. Here I stand in awe as you fade from my sight only to ponder the journey that lies ahead for those who catch a glimpse of your path…

~Adam (A little note for Just L from the best martini mixologist in Capitola, CA, July 2016)

“Love Letters” are letters to or from Just L periodically pulled from the vault.

Love Letters – Lost in Translation

My Beloved:

There are two essential ingredients proven to correlate with a happy existence: “One is love. The other is finding a way of coping with life that does not push love away.”

I believe I have proven by my actions – over and over – that I love, respect and value you. I know I am a woman who deserves all of that in exchange. And I thought that I have simply by being me – a person of high integrity, sincerity, self-sufficient, and safe – allowed you / me to give / receive love with ease, openness, and vulnerability. I have counted us – our most intimate parts – and everything that covers and sustains us as sacred. I have done my very best to support and nurture you as you navigate in the world; to honor you as a man, and more importantly as “my” man; and to be a best friend who has a positive effect on your self-esteem and well-being. Though our attraction sparkles, and our many days have been filled with fun, my love for you runs deep, far beyond a fleeting romantic feeling.

From the moment you declared you were falling in love with me, I have selflessly and happily offered to you:

  • Expressions of affection, both physical and emotional.
  • A wish to offer you pleasure and satisfaction.
  • Tenderness, compassion, and sensitivity to your needs.
  • A desire for shared activities and pursuits, discovering new adventures.
  • A playful partner who will forever be young in spirit and value fun.
  • Concern, comfort, and outward assistance for your aspirations.
  • An ongoing, honest exchange of personal feelings.
  • A level of maturity that can withstand inevitable shortcomings.
  • Protect your solitude, safeguarding the fragile parts of our humanity.
  • A promise to extend to you an abundant amount of grace when fear, anger and hurt arises, recognizing always what is beautiful and worthy and true between us.
  • A level of sharing of possessions that I expected would naturally grow over time.
  • Believing in a future together, integrating you wholeheartedly into my life and family.

Have I in every instance met my own high standard perfectly? No. I have at times surely failed. Have you in every instance met my needs? No. You remain decidedly guarded. I have never deceived you or misled you in a way that would fracture your sense of reality. I have been patient and gentle with you. There is no doubt – as proven by my actions (beyond the many poetic words I have penned to you or about you) that I love you, I want you, I admire you, and I respect you. I adore you – entirely as is. I have never wavered on this.

I am a woman of faith, but I am not a fool. I have made a conscious choice to share my all with you – I am ALL IN. I have withheld nothing from you. I hope that I am not mistaken in my understanding, after all this time and shared moments, of the depth of your love for me and your commitment to me. I pray I have not misjudged you, one I believed to be a quality and courageous man of high character.

At this moment, I am bereft.  While I am not broken, my heart surely is.

You hold the key as to whether we continue to create something uniquely beautiful together or tragically break apart. Also recognize indecision becomes a decision with time.

I hope you return to love.

~Just L (written what seems like once upon a time, shared on my site June 21, 2016)

First Kiss

“Love Letters” are letters to or from Just L periodically pulled from the vault.

 

It All Goes Away With You

HOW sweet your voice can be
I know
For sure. I’m going to miss
When you go
Not just a kiss
It’s all that flows
Inside my mind:

OH beautiful mother
Of Two
There are those
Among us
Who have touched
Your skin, your lips
And now realize
How precious
Your LIFE is;

(Who is not to cry
In your arms
After seeing light
In your eyes);

OH pretty lady
You stand so fine
Your body and mind
I wish I could
Steal you and fly
To lovers land

Ever since I walked
Next to you
Your dream
Has been
Coming back to me
And it’s so fine
So real
I could follow you
For a hundred years
My emotions
Have just begun
But now I close my eyes
You will be gone
So far
So close you are
Inside my heart:

(You stand alone
And steal the power
Of those who want
To be your lover)

Good Bye
My Love
It all goes
Away with YOU.

~Adrian Rodriguez (Handwritten love letter/poem by Adrian for me, Just L, August 1992)

Published in the October 2015 Blender of Love Digest

“Love Letters” are letters to or from Just L periodically pulled from the vault.

Author’s Note: It started when we met on a walk and ended when I moved from UC San Diego to the University of Oregon. He would have followed me anywhere on earth… Alas, I said “No” and he returned to Mexico City.