Vorfreude

I stare at you and ponder how incredibly sweet that I have found you in this state. After all the life we have lived there is something inexplicable about falling deeply in love years beyond our youth. I would have never guessed the depths of my delight. Once envious of those who have had many years together, too long I mourned for what did not arrive before. I witnessed age take its toll on my body, believing that this somehow diminished my capacity to love. I have at last come to realize I have been using the wrong measurement. I am eternally intrigued by the joy, abundance, strength, and fragility at my fingertips. My scars tell a story of courageous living. My authenticity is all encompassing, and grace flows more easily. None of this possible without the journey I have traveled. I am grateful. Often more quiet but no less aroused. I relish the smallest sensation, curse at my body while laughing out loud, and look forward to everything to come.

~Just L (February 17, 2016: A journal entry from August 31, 2015)

Published in the March 2016 Blender of Love Digest

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